My last two posts have been about yummy food.

Played bass in the Upper Room Praise Band at a youth retreat last weekend.

One of my minor dreams came true. I played my bass in my Detroit jacket.

Super pimpy. I messed up a bajillion times but it was still awesome.

I think I've said this before, but once someone told me to strive for joy not happiness because happiness can be fleeting.

Joy is at my core right now. The reason why I know this is because I do have a "peace that passeth human understanding."

Cuz I shouldn't be peaceful. There's family problems. There's work problems. There's serious money problems. Money just isn't adding up right now when it comes to saving. We're simply just not meeting a lot of our saving goals. Am I fearful? Yes. Am I worried? Yes. Am I nervous? Yes.

But all this exists at just beneath skin level.

So we'll say there's 3 levels. Skin, Sub-skin, Core.

Skin? Smiling.
Sub-skin? Up and down.
Core? Smiling

Am I not peaceful core? No.
Am I not joyful at my core? No.

Anyways... that's where I'm at right now.

When I was playing the bass, at one point I was jumping up and down with G and that felt awesome. I would occassionally look over my shoulder at J and just smile cuz he's a sweet drummer. We picked up this 21 year Taiwanese hip hop dude that happened to be this freak on the violin. Absolutely amazing.

Ryan takes us to a new crazy level on the keys.
Kelly and Aileen's voices take us to another level.
Shakers and Tamborine bring us up higher.
Throw in the pro violinist and we're professionals.

It was awesome.

I lost to J in fantasy football. I can't tell you how fun it was to cheer on the Bears D.
I can't begin to tell you how much Isaiah and Ethan bring to the table in terms of joy. Joy on tap. They are just life. Real life. Pure. Anger and sadness and happiness are all Isaiah knows. I'm at a loss for words. If you don't know, if you haven't been in the trenches of parenthood, this is one struggle that I do wish for you.

Cons
Up late at night.
Whining.
Crying for silly reasons.
Asking for ridiculous things.
Having to watch their annoying tv shows.
Pure anger.

Pros
Holding them as you fall asleep together.
Listening as they try and sing silly songs you made up.
Watching as they run up hills and slide down slides.
Mauling them with hugs and kisses and zerberts.
Hiding together under covers from monsters. (Shhhh, I scared. No! I scared!)
Pure laughter.

Scared of having kids? You might always be.
Think you're not ready? You might never be.
Don't think you can handle the pain and sacrifice? Maybe you can't.

But you won't ever know what I'm talking about until you know.

I turn 30 in just over 2 months.

Jesus started his real ministry at 30. He died at 33. Changed the world.
Eric started ___ at 30. He died at ___. ___ the world.